How Can You Predict The Strength of Your Relationship?

*** Check out the latest study and new test devised to help you predict the strength of your relationship.




From Denny: Leave it up to medical researchers to figure out a test that can tell us when to make a fast exit out of a relationship. The things these guys study... :)

Researchers believe they have devised a test that can tell if a relationship can hold together or fall apart. They think they can predict the strength of a relationship.

Human relationships experience a lot of emotional pain and it seems we are forever looking for that pain avoidance - at least in American culture. Well, what if we did know exactly when it was a good idea to exit that romantic relationship? Figuring out whether to break up or stay together is often a wrenching decision for most people. So, what if science has figured out a way to make the process easier?

The University of Rochester researchers who did this study, and devised the test, say it involves discovering what people really think and feel about their partners. That sounds simple enough.

Turns out that previous studies found people were very reluctant, even unable to express their true feelings about their partners. Ronald D. Rogge, coauthor of this study, says, "That assumes that they know themselves how happy they are, and that's not always the case."

So, Rogge and his team decided on a test where volunteers supplied their partner's first name and then two other words that related to that partner, like an affectionate pet name or perhaps a distinctive characteristic. Then the volunteers were asked to watch a monitor as words were presented on the screens. Positive ideas were displayed like "vacation" and "peace" also paired with the partner-related words. Then bad ideas, negative connotations, like "tragedy" and "criticize" were paired with the partner-related words.

The volunteers watching the monitors were then asked to press a bar when they saw various words. One test featured the negative connotation words and partner-related words and another test involved the positive pairings. Researchers hoped to get people to automatically react to the words.

What researchers found is that if people generally had good associations with their partners they would definitely perform the "good words" positive connotations task easier than the "bad words" task.

Researchers also discovered in this test that those who associated bad words with their partners, had greater difficulty associating their partner with good words, well, these people were far more likely to separate their relationship during the next year.

Sometimes, the indirect approach works better with uncovering what is difficult to express. When asked directly people often feel pressured to give the appropriate societal response as opposed to how they really feel about their partner. This test would be useful for therapists when clients are unwilling or fearful to divulge their true feelings about their partner. It also helps to pinpoint the nature of the relationship problem.

From the study: "In deteriorating relationships, the negative associations people begin to form about their partner may be too subtle or threatening for them to recognize in themselves or too socially undesirable for them to report to others."

The study was in the journal Psychological Science.



*** Photo by Kjunstorms @ flickr

*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

*** Come by for a visit and check out my other blogs:

The Social Poets - news, politics
The Soul Calendar - science, astronomy, psychology
Visual Insights - photos, art, music
Beautiful Illustrated Quotations - spiritual quotes, philosophy
Poems From A Spiritual Heart - poetry
The Healing Waters - health news
Dennys People Watching - people in the news
Dennys Food and Recipes
Dennys Funny Quotes - humor

Lonely people: Under More Pressure Have Higher Blood Pressure

*** Be aware of how loneliness can impact your daily health.





From Denny: The "geniuses" in the medical community have finally figured out the obvious - that loneliness and social isolation can cause more than severe tearing on the psyche. It also affects blood pressure.

The study was done at the University of Chicago. Researchers surveyed 229 people ages 50 to 68. These respondents were part of the Chicago Health, Aging and Social Relations Study. This was a multi-year study cutting across racial and ethnic boundaries as well as gender to include white, black and Latino men and women.

Those surveyed were asked to rate their feelings about various statements, for example:

"I lack companionship"
"I feel in tune with the people around me"
"My social relationships are superficial"

The study also recorded other details like smoking status, physical activity levels, body mass index and cardiovascular health to see how it might impact the survey results. Those surveyed were monitored for five years.

What did researchers discover about the link of loneliness to higher blood pressure? They found out that those who ranked the highest for feeling the most lonely had blood pressure levels as much as 14.4 points higher than those surveyed who felt least lonely.

Another startling fact of concern is that those surveyed who had the higher levels of loneliness when they started the study found their systolic blood pressure increased over the years of the study.

Need a definition of what is systolic blood pressure? Check out what eMedTV says: "Systolic blood pressure is the amount of pressure that blood exerts on vessels while the heart is beating. In a blood pressure reading (such as 120/80), it is the number on the top. If the top and bottom blood pressures are both too high, a person is said to have high blood pressure. If only the top number is higher than 140, the person has a condition called isolated systolic hypertension."

Researchers also found that even when they factored in other details like age, race, ethnicity, gender, cardiovascular risk factors and depression - their findings held true. Lonely people find their blood pressure higher than others feeling less lonely.

The study appeared in the journal Psychology and Aging.

This is where having a pet and/or a regular social routine is helpful to manage stress. Be sure to see your doctor and a nutritionist if you are suffering feelings of loneliness and/or depression.

Many times, depression and low feelings are a result of an improper diet. Many people with active nervous systems - like creative people - need higher levels of B vitamins. It is often that simple to start feeling better and more sociable.


*** THANKS for visiting, feel welcome to drop a comment or opinion, enjoy bookmarking this post on your favorite social site, a big shout out to awesome current subscribers – and if you are new to this blog, please subscribe in a reader or by email updates!

*** Come by for a visit and check out my other blogs:

The Social Poets - news, politics
The Soul Calendar - science, astronomy, psychology
Visual Insights - photos, art, music
Beautiful Illustrated Quotations - spiritual quotes, philosophy
Poems From A Spiritual Heart - poetry
The Healing Waters - health news
Dennys People Watching - people in the news
Dennys Food and Recipes
Dennys Funny Quotes - humor

Video: Dreams Explained and What We Can Learn From Them

From Denny: Did you know that you can dream up to 20 dreams in one night? Dream analysis has long been the subject of fascination for the psychology world as well as the general public. These ladies discuss the most common dreams and to remember that dreams are metaphors in your life.

What's fun is to keep a notebook by your bed and when you wake up in the middle of the night, record as much as you can remember. Even when a dream is vivid and you think you will remember it easily a few hours later, you often don't. I've written some of my best poetry and other writings like this in the middle of the night, sketching down some brief thoughts or insights.

They also talk about how you can train yourself to remember your dreams. True. They also said you can go back into a dream that isn't going well and rewrite it to a better scenario. Also true. You can even incubate a dream to help you solve a problem in your waking life. True. I've done them all. Why waste a nightly resource of eight hours working for you to help you have a better life?

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

How Can Our Dreams Prevent Us From Awakening?

Image via Wikipedia

From Denny: Carl Jung, often touted as the father of modern psychiatry, specialized in dream analysis. He was also a very spiritual person with a deep faith in God. What he discovered in his studies is that often when we look outside ourselves for answers those answers elude us. Yet when we look inside ourselves the awareness comes as to what unconscious obstacles we have been throwing in the path of achieving our dreams.

Looking outside ourselves sets us up for frustration. We can reach outside to others for information to help us look within. We read posts like this and books on the subject we are trying to learn more about before we begin the long process of introspection; all that is helpful. The problem arises, and this is what I think Jung is stressing here in this quote, is that people can become co-dependent on the next speaker at a seminar, the next church class, the next DVD series all in the name of learning more. At some point it becomes "busy work" setting us up to doubt ourselves to the point of inaction.

The step two in the process after information gathering is to turn inward for introspection. This act is not about doubting or beating up yourself with negative and regretful self-talk of what you did or didn't do. It's about allowing your own spirit to reveal to your every day conscious mind what is holding you back from achieving your dreams and goals. Our spirit understands our desires and knows how to meet them.

The disconnect comes when our conscious every day mind (the one who makes lists and goes grocery shopping = the left brain) doesn't listen to our spirit revealing insight through the right brain. Basically, because of our Western culture we shut down and close the door from our right brain, essentially shutting out half of the information we need to make good decisions in life. You could say the left brain is downright bossy in it's need to dominate rather than cooperate in a partnership for the benefit of all.

Carl Jung stumbled upon a profound insight. Lucky us that he chose to write about it for the benefit of future generations. Because he listened to his own spirit within we now have a wealth of knowledge at our fingertips. All that is left is action on our part to look within.

Quote

"Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart. Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens." Carl Jung


Carl Jung, Psychology, Social Sciences, Dream interpretation, Psychoanalytic and Psychodynamic, Dream, Psychiatry, Brain, Consciousness

Do You Realize Speaking Kindness to Others Benefits You!

From Denny: This is a wonderful profound statement about the long-lasting effects of kindness when someone hears these words. Have you ever considered how much good it does your own heart - and health - when it hears you speak these words out loud for another? Both of you benefit!

This act of kindness goes a long way toward developing emotional intelligence to the highest level and boosting the health of your own immune system against disease. After all "dis-ease" is to be out of balance. Kindness creates an "ease" bringing all into balance again, making you and others stronger!

Quote

"Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." ~ Mother Theresa


Emotional Health and Wellbeing, healing, kindness, Emotional intelligence, Immune system, Intelligence, Conditions and Diseases, Social Sciences, Psychology, Cancer, Health

The Joy Makers: Feel the Love

Photo by -Gep- @ flickr

The Joy Makers: Feel the Love: "Improv group brings joy to surprised thousands
Stop here for free joy, hugs, love and a happiness high that will last for days!"

by Denny Lyon

From Denny: For just a little while, forget about job loss, the economy and all your worries. These funny videos done by some terrific improvisation folks is well worth the laughing time!

I pulled them all together into one article as your go-to place when you need cheering up from a lousy day or when your thoughts turn to depression. There is no way to stay depressed after watching these nine great YouTube videos.

Psychology and Its Importance

Psychology and Its Importance: "What’s the function of psychology? Is it important? What’s the importance of this then? What do you call a person who studies psychology? There are a lot of questions concerning psychology..."

By raymondphillippe
Photo by Terence J Sullivan @ flickr

Great overview to help point people toward the area they might like to investigate further on their own.